Ditch that old wineskin, NOW!

Our beautiful white star magnolia is in full bloom at the moment. As I was enjoying watching it burst into blossom, I noticed one of the flowers was having something of a malfunction. Instead of opening from the middle as usual, the furry bud cover had remained stuck, trapping the petal tips inside (as in the photo). Because my attention was drawn so strongly to this, I asked God what He wanted to tell me about it.

“The old wineskin is about to fall and the pure Bride will be released in spotless glory!”

These were the words that immediately popped into my mind. I know it is mixing metaphors, but my sense was that it is time for the constraints of the past to go, it is time for us - the people of God, both as individuals and corporately - to be fully released into all the potential within us.

Watching this bud over the course of a week, although the petals kept pushing out from the bottom, the furry cap stayed stuck fast. And then, one day I went out and the whole flower was gone! Looking around, I found it on the ground, still stuck in the cap. I was quite dismayed, wondering what it meant, as I was so looking forward to the “bursting forth” and the “breaking free”. I asked the Lord about it again and His response hit me hard.

It was a warning.

If you don’t let go of the old wineskin, not only will you fail to reach your potential, fail to bloom, but you will no longer even be attached to the tree. You will be separated.

Since this, I have been asking the Lord what the old wineskin represents. What am I still holding on to? What to I need to let go of?

As I continued to ponder on the old wineskin, and what it signifies, suddenly I saw a connection with some aspects of identity we have been sitting with over the last few months.

My husband has been a journey through this and we are digging deep into how we walk it. He felt the Lord telling him that he (and we all) need to lay down – even resign from – every identity that we have save one. Every identity except our identity as a child of God. We need to lay every other identity down at the feet of Jesus: parent, spouse, boss, worker, teacher, pastor, sister, brother, friend, whatever roles we play in life in our relationships with others and what we do; whether we are “the funny one”, “the grumpy one”, “the helpless one”, “the wealthy one”, “the accident prone one”, “the perfectionist”, “the spiritual one” or whatever other label we have attached to ourselves, we must let go of all of them. We need to strip ourselves bare of every identity we own or hold on to, everything about us. It is from this place we learn to stand on who we are in Jesus alone*.

To explain further, it reminds me of a season I went through some years back where God asked me to stop doing pretty much everything I was involved in. It was a year of learning to simply be – to find my identity, my value in being in Him rather than in what I did.

It is a tough place.

We live in a society where pretty much the first question we ask a new acquaintance is “What do you do?”. So much of our perceived value (in the eyes of the world particularly) comes from what we do, what we produce – our work(s), what we have to offer. Early on in my journey as a parent, when people asked me what I did, I had to catch myself as I would reply, “I’m just a mum”. Even though I chose to focus on parenting, it reflected back to me that I didn’t really value that role either. I believed what the world told me about it.

The truth is, most of us look to others around us for our validation, to reflect back to us that we are worth something, that what we do has value. It is why our fragile egos flip from feeling great when we get positive reinforcement to feeling despair, hopelessness or worthlessness when the feedback is not so flattering or even absent. This has become much more obvious in this era of social media, where everything we put out into the cyber world is measured through this lens.

However, if we have confidence about our identity in Christ, if we firmly plant our feet on Him as our Rock, everything we do, every role and “identity” that we take up becomes an offering to Him, and is for the building of His Kingdom. It ceases to be about getting our own needs for affirmation and validation met, but is rather an outworking of our assurance in who we are in Him. The mess of our deceitful hearts looking to their own agenda is replaced with a pure heart, pure motives, simply to serve God. And oh, there is such freedom in this place. Our master ceases to be public opinion and becomes the One who loves us unconditionally – not because of what we can do for Him, but because we belong to Him, we are His creation.

At the end of the podcast, there is an opportunity to spend some time with Jesus reflecting on those aspects of our identity that are not grounded in Him. You can do this on your own as well. Ask Him what aspects of your identity you need to lay down at His feet, to give up to Him. He may give them back to you, or may transform them into a new way of being. You can also ask Him what He wants to tell you about your identity in Him – what He loves about you, what He has placed in you – and ask Him what He wants to do through these. He may also ask you to wait until you have walked a while without any identity but as His child.

*If you are having difficulty with understanding what it means to be a child of God, a really helpful book is “Who I am in Christ”, by Neil T Anderson, or you can just look up images with the same information and there are many showing the key verses from Scripture.

Backing track CALM - Deep Instrumental worship (No copyright music) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzO5oe8hAaI

An invitation: It’s for NOW, so don’t wait!

In a prayer group recently, we were presented with a couple of pictures that immediately spoke to me deeply, linking in with a number of other thoughts. The first of these pictures was a garden doorway.

(C) Richard walker - Used with permission (https://www.flickr.com/photos/richwall100/3878198108)

Straight away, I saw an invitation here from the Lord for us to enter in to a new and very different space. It is an invitation to step out from what is familiar and filled with what is known, out from what is expected and seen as normal, and out from what feels safe, into the UNKNOWN and UNFAMILIAR.

From a season of extended lockdown, (particularly here in Melbourne, Australia), there is an invitation to step out into something we possibly can’t even see. It is not only the “unknown”, it is also the “unseen”. Just as in this picture, we cannot see around the corner, we don’t know what lies outside that door, the only way to find out is to step through the doorway. We have to make a commitment to STEP FORWARD before we can see what we will STEP INTO. Perhaps we can’t even see Jesus in the space we are stepping into – it is filled with so much uncertainty, particularly as we lack long distance vision or understanding, but I hear His voice coming from around that corner, in the distance, calling us, “COME ON!! COME ON!! MY BELOVED, FOLLOW ME into this new space. I have so much for you here, but you have to step out, you have to let go of what is past.”

This leads to the second picture. In this, of the last strand of a rope about to be cut, I immediately saw that God is wanting to cut our ties to the things of the past. It is not necessarily that they were bad, but that they are not for now. The problem now is that they will only slow us down and keep us busy and focussed on that which is not important at this time. It is a season where we need to streamline, to slim down in order to travel fast and far. Just like travelling by air (remember that?!), you can’t take everything with you. You have to trust that anything extra you need will be available at the other end in some form, that you will receive the provision for your needs as you go.

We are entering a new season and a new season needs new ways. Many people have been quoting Is 43:19 in the last couple of years: “I am doing something new; it’s springing up — can’t you see it? I am making a road in the desert, rivers in the wasteland.” The repeated message is, “if it’s new, it’s going to be different, it’s going to be unfamiliar, we won’t know what it looks like until we get there.”

If we go back to verse 18, we have further admonishment: “Stop dwelling on past events and brooding over times gone by”.

Over the past month or so, I had three dreams about people dying. In the first and third dreams, they were people who were significant to me who actually died many years ago. The middle one was a current friend. In all three dreams, I was absolutely distraught by grief and woke up expecting my pillow to be saturated. After the third dream, I was really wanting to understand what God was trying to get my attention about in this – the level of grief seemed extreme to anything I felt on waking.

I sensed that these dreams are about what many in the Body of Christ are experiencing now around what is missing or even gone from our lives. In the dreams, there was almost a desperate desire to bring back that which was gone and there was the associated powerlessness that comes with loss. We are hurting from the loss of what we held dear. But, somewhat brutally, I feel that again, Jesus is calling us forward, almost callously, like He spoke to the rich young ruler in Luke 18, who He invited to give up everything that was valuable to him: “Forget the past, move on, we don’t have time for grief, for what needs to be left in the past, I’ve got so many new and better things for you, but they require you to forget the old ways, to be ready to learn new things.”

In our small, semi-rural community, we have spent the past nine months – the time of gestation! – pondering all this.

What does it look like to be a Kingdom people, to step into something new, to step into what God has for us?

What do we bring with us?

What do we leave behind?

What needs to change?

In the last weeks, in the middle of arguably the world’s harshest, but most certainly longest lockdown, rather than look at all the things we can’t do, we have been doing what we can, as well as asking the question around what we can do in new ways. Meeting together has obviously had it’s challenges in many places around the world. For us, a few weeks back we were told we could meet outside the church with five plus a pastor. So we have.

A couple of days a week, we have stood outside our church with a guitar and our masks, and we have worshipped God and prayed, possibly to the amusement of the mechanics across the street and others walking past. We are not polished, we are far from perfect, we haven’t practiced, but we stand there in confidence and faith that God is with us, and that what we do there is important.

In the middle of this, there have been a number of confirmations that God is not concerned about us getting back to “church as usual” inside our buildings. I actually think He is overjoyed that we are coming out! Perhaps that is one of the “unknowns” Jesus is calling us all to. To be really harsh, we might hear Him call to us:

“Lazarus, come out!”

This makes me think of Martha’s response: “…by this time he stinketh”, and I am reminded of items I have collected that are from the past, whether my own, or from the generations before. When I bring them out of storage, there is usually a bit of a smell about them, a smell of mustiness, of staleness. To be blunt, for many of us, it is time for us to freshen up, to start carrying the fragrance of heaven, rather than the fragrance of everything from the past. Just like yesterday’s dinner smells are no longer as appetising as they were when we sat down to that meal, we need to open up and let the wind of the Spirit freshen and clean out what belongs to the past. We must let go of it.

And just as James admonishes in James 2:17, “…faith by itself, unaccompanied by actions, is dead.”, it’s time for us to show that our faith is indeed alive, filled with the abundant life, the overflowing life that Jesus promised us, through our actions. There is such need, such hunger, such poverty in our communities, whether that is physical, emotional or spiritual. Will we continue to be blind to it? As painful as it can be, can we afford to keep it at arm’s length and not allow it to touch our hearts?

As we worshipped and shared in the front yard of our church on Thursday, we had a discussion about what God has for us in this new season and I felt to read again from Acts 2, where Peter stands up and says, “‘The Lord says: “In the Last Days, I will pour out from my Spirit upon everyone. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my slaves, both men and women, will I pour out from my Spirit in those days; and they will prophesy.”

Even as I started to read, the word “POUR” leapt up in my heart. God does not give us His Spirit by drip feed, or on occasion, or when we are particularly being “good-enough”, or “spiritual”. His promise is to “POUR IT OUT”. One of the ladies in our church is starting a painting that is three metres high and is of a waterfall with a person under it. I believe this is what God has for each of us – that just as Jesus POURED OUT His life for us, He continues to POUR OUT His Spirit over and in us. We just have to position ourselves at His feet, like Mary, to receive from Him. It is a place of humility; it is a place of letting go of our personal preferences, our personal desires; it is the place of SURRENDER.

The only question that remains is,

“AM I WILLING?”

“ Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given to you when Jesus Christ is revealed.” (1 Peter 1:13 )

Preparing the ground: A message for the Church (Part 2)

I often sense God speaking to me through spiritual parallels of what I see going on in the natural world around me. A little while back I felt Him speaking to me about the Church as I overhauled a section of our garden.

We live in a cottage that is over 100 years old, situated on around an acre of land. Although the garden is well-established, it ended up in disarray as the previous owner aged and was no longer able to keep up. It has taken much time and effort to restore and rebuild, as has the house. Although there are some “good bones” to it all, including some amazingly beautiful specimen trees of great height and strength, there have been many areas which ivy, blackberries, wisteria, “weed trees” - those growing in the wrong places - and a myriad of other weeds and pest plants had overtaken. Some plants lacked proper tending or pruning and have grown crookedly or in an unbalanced way. While we have been able to salvage many, others have needed complete removal.

In the past, my gardening had consisted of merely adding plants to fill the gaps just to keep the garden going and provide less space for weeds. It gave me little overall satisfaction. More recently, I have felt energised to make a fresh start on some areas.

I began completely revamping one of the garden beds removing many weeds and unhelpful or struggling plants that were in the wrong place. Much of the area had very little growing in it, and those things I had planted were generally quite unproductive. As I started digging over the soil, I found the reason:

The soil was choked and hardened by masses of tangled roots from previous plants long since gone.

It took a great deal of work to get it ready for re-planting. This was the prompt for the thoughts that follow.

As I removed new plants from their pots and placed them in the hole in the garden bed, which was now very easy to dig due to our excellent mountain soil, I thought about how much joy there is in planting:

Most of us love to plant, but how little do we enjoy the hard work preparing the soil for the planting.

In the past, I have often been in too much hurry to see the end result of planting without doing the preparation. I had really not put in the effort to establish a good environment for the plant to grow well. Sometimes I have put plants in inappropriate places simply because I like them, not because they are right for the environment or position. Subsequently they have really struggled and not grown well, or simply died.

What I felt from God was something of a caution, or advice.

We are living in a season where many are sensing a great move of God. Things are stirring and shifting and the hunger for revival is rising. In among all this, I sense what God is showing me through my garden is not only what He is doing in the Church, but also about how we need to cooperate with Him if we want the change to be lasting.

Preparation is an essential beginning.

For at least the last decade or more, there has been a sense for me that God has been pruning, removing, digging up, stirring up, relocating His people. It has came with the feeling that the time for us to get on board and work with Him in this had a limit: if we refuse to move, or to allow the pruning, we will get left out/behind in what He is going to do next – such an important part of preparing His Bride. Just as with my garden,

God wants a Church that is well-prepared so it can grow well.

I believe church communities must be prepared to reassess what they are doing, to be prepared to rein some activities in, to prune them back and decrease the focus on them. Others simply need to go completely – they are either total weeds, taking over a distracting from God’s work, or they are in the wrong place – might be lovely somewhere else, but not for what God is doing in that particular community.

There are other places where there are still roots from things long gone. These are more difficult to remove. They might be belief systems about “how church works” or structures within church systems that no longer feed anything, but simply cause a blockage and prevent further growth and sustenance. They may have once been good, but are now simply a hindrance to further growth.

In a nutshell, I believe that while there are aspects of our faith communities that are like my strong, beautiful trees, that give structure and form, there are many aspects of how we “do church” that are past their prime and are no longer functioning or productive to our purpose. They may have simply been “place fillers”, or even worse, weeds; things we did to look productive or fill our space. Some of them were things we just wanted to do because we liked them, or they looked good in another church community, but in the long run they have either had no purpose, or not been productive in the way we might have wished.

As I mentioned in Part 1, we really need to reassess how we “do church” as a whole – come back to our true vision and calling, as The Church and as church communities and even as individuals. Along with the previous questions, we might ask these:

What is our calling in the community we are part of and how is the best way to do this with our resources, both human and otherwise?

Are we prepared to scrutinise every aspect of our church life in partnership with the Holy Spirit to determine our best way forward to be the most effective we can for the Kingdom?

Are there areas of our community life that we declare “untouchable” – sacred cows that tolerate no reassessment? These are often the areas in most need of change!

No going back: A message for the Church (Part 1)

As I have been watching churches scramble to bring some sense of normalcy and connection into their congregations at this time, when everything seems to have been tipped upside down, I am reminded of a dream I had just over two years ago.

It was quite a graphic and disturbing dream and everything was in full colour. In the dream, I was in something like an observation room overlooking a surgical theatre. All was pristine white, and there was a very large man lying on a gurney or operating table. Even as I looked, I realised he was fat because he was pregnant, and indeed, was in the process of birthing. It disturbed me and I was thinking, “That’s unnatural, but I guess it is to be expected these days”.

As I watched, there were three or four other men around him, all in white coats (like doctors), and as I wondered how he could physically give birth, they started to cut him open. They were behind him, and started cutting up along his spine starting at his buttocks and then, to my further horror, started peeling off his skin. He was screaming out in pain, and as I watched in revulsion the men were saying, it’s ok, he’ll be all right as we have another skin to replace this one with. At this point, there was another man standing in with them, watching, and I understood that they were going to give his skin to the original man. At this point, the dream was disturbing me so much I woke up.

Creative Commons: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Wings_Laparoscopic_operating_theatre.jpg

Reflecting and praying into what this dream means, I have sensed is that it is a message about the Church. There are several points that stand out to me.

Over the last few decades, as many branches of the Church have struggled with decline in numbers, various groups have investigated what needs to change to remain relevant or in touch with the general population, to bring people back in or keep them from leaving. To this end,

there have been numerous attempts to “birth” something new.

While not all of this has been negative, in a number of circumstances, all we have really been doing is changing the outward appearance (the “skin”) without actually changing the fact that underneath we are still operating out of “man’s” flesh or the ways of the world. In short, I believe we have often been trying to birth the things of man, rather than things of the spirit. It reminds me of Jesus’ parable of the new wine in old wineskins, except this is trying to put new wineskins on old wine. However, I believe the old ways of doing things will no longer work; they are causing too much pain  - it is time for the Church to come into a new season of the Spirit in every way.

It’s time for NEW wine in NEW wineskins!

I see that this way of operating, looking to ideas of human origin has invaded many branches of the Church, whether traditional, charismatic, Pentecostal or otherwise alternative. Wherever we are tangled up in the difference between what we “should do” and how to “be” the people of God we will continue to struggle. This is both at a personal and corporate level, although in many scenarios, what some leadership carry can infect the congregation adversely as well.

To me, the underlying issue is whether our mode of operation is from the perspective of the knowledge of good and evil (i.e. “this is right, this is wrong”, “do this to be a “good Christian”, to have the “favour of God””) or whether we are truly connecting people with the life source, allowing Holy Spirit to be their Guide and Counsellor, helping people to be connected first to God and then to each other, so that each person’s identity is firmly in relationship with God, rather than looking constantly to church leaders to know how we must behave and whether or not we are on the “right path”.

Over the last few years, it has become very clear that we are moving into a new era. The era of the Church being the primary focus in relation to our faith is quite abruptly over, I believe. With COVID-19 and the lockdowns, we have been catapulted out of the comfortable nest of “church-life” into the air, to living out “Kingdom life”. This is not to say that Church is over, but I certainly believe it is being stripped of all that needs to go. We are being released from all those things that have tied us to the ground and prevented us soaring as we are meant to.

The KINGDOM ERA has begun!

Part of another dream I had a couple of months back also relates in here. In the dream, I was hanging out washing (just doing normal life), and as I did, I became aware of a swirling mist coming down through the trees. (We live in the mountains, with tall forest around us.) Just as I was wondering if it was actually mist or whether it was smoke from someone burning off (either of which was going to disrupt what I was doing!), I smelt the smoke, but also started hearing the crackling of burning green leaves. Things then happened very rapidly, with the crackling getting louder and louder and then the very large (20+m) pittosporum trees across the road from us suddenly bursting into flame. Even as I called 000, emergency services, I got a text on my phone stating, “we are aware of an incident in your area”. Straight after this, I got a call from a firefighter (I could see him in uniform – whoever said dreams had to be practical!), asking what was going on. As I looked back to the trees, I realised that the fire had already gone out. All that was left was blackened branches against the sky, with one central branch still burning.

As I explored the meaning of this dream, which again, I felt was about the Church, I feel the important part for this discussion is about the leaves. As I was looking into the significance of the type of trees burning (which didn’t really turn up much for me), what I was aware of is the fact that they are very prolifically leafy, which has its benefits. However, it reminded me that when trees produce a great deal of leaves, this can inhibit their ability to produce fruit. In fact, leafiness, to an extent, can be inversely proportional to fruitfulness.

The message to the Church as I see it is that much of what we have been doing has been producing leaves not fruit. God, in His gracious mercy, is giving us the opportunity for radical change. In this time of inability to continue with “business as usual”, we have a unique opportunity to really dig deep and reassess what is important for the Church, the Body perhaps especially down to how we are structured. As restrictions pare us back to the bare bones, will we continue to desperately scramble to work out how we can continue with “business as usual”, or are we ready to go on the Holy Spirit ride of our lives for something completely new?

“Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” Is 43:19

As others have observed, the time for “cookie cutter” or “church franchising” is over. It is time to stop looking to what has worked elsewhere and simply adding it to our own model and hoping for the same results.

We have to look to God alone for our unique way forward.

To help us move ahead and find the new that God for us, the questions below are a starting point:

“What is God’s vision for our village/town/region?”

“What has God placed in our area is unique or particular to us in our role to enlarge and release the Kingdom of God where we are?” 

“What is already going on that doesn’t match up with that vision?”

“What are the gifts and abilities God has already placed in our community to bring about this vision, that illuminate our role in this?”

“How can we work with the other communities of God in our area to bring about this vision?”

If nothing changes, nothing changes

Social media gets a bad rap for being shallow and filled with pretention. However, every now and then something pops into my social media feed that impacts me at a much deeper level. Such was the case a few days back when I came across this beautiful painting of the wise men looking over Bethlehem by Jeremy Thomas (check him out HERE) in one of my favourite groups.

As I enjoyed the intricate details he had included, something about their stance resonated with me. There was a sense of weariness and longing:

(C) Jeremy Thomas. Used with permission.

“It’s been such a long journey and we still have a way to go…”

But along with this, there was a sense of anticipation:

“We can just about touch our destination – there is a clear light at the end of the tunnel!”

Thinking about the ramifications and depths of this, the realisation there was a reason these men started out on their trek suddenly hit me. I found myself questionning what was it that propelled these people to go on such a long search? At an obvious level, we are told that they were people who looked at the signs in the sky that pointed them towards the birth of a new and important king. However, why were they looking? What started them on that journey?

They didn’t see an advertisement in a newspaper, on a flyer in their mailbox or online. They didn’t get an invitation to a conference, a guest speaker or even a party. There was no job application or even anointing or appointing (that we know of!) from their local church.

What I sensed about these men was that they were watchers and observers. They were watching for something, waiting for something: for a change, for a new season.

And I would guess the reason they were watching and observing was because they were not satisfied with the way things were; they were not satisfied with the status quo. They wanted, desired and hungered for change; for things in the world they lived in to be different. Something was missing from what they knew of life.

While we don’t know anything more about them than the fact they were from the east, we do know that the land east of Jerusalem is all rugged and mountainous desert. Not much lives there.

They came from a barren place and they knew it.

This was not a journey you would undertake unless you were really, deeply seeking something you couldn’t get staying where you were. It was a dangerous and uncertain journey across territory filled with lawlessness. There were no MacDonald’s to eat at, no service (petrol/gas) stations and probably even the wells were few and far between. Death by bandit, starvation or thirst was pretty certain for those who were not wary or well prepared.

But still, they were desperate and hungry enough to take the journey to find the One who was to be King of the Jews. They knew their spiritual need and sought to satisfy it. They also knew how to interpret the spiritual meaning of signs in the natural world.

In our western world of plenty, of satiation even, I sometimes wonder if we even have the capacity to recognise our poverty. It reminds me of a quote from C.S. Lewis,

“We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

As I look around me, I see we are still chasing answers from gods made from stone, metal and the words of ideology; gods made by the hands and minds of people; gods without the power to give us any answer, let alone solve our problems or provide for our needs.

These wise men, these magi, they knew they had a lack; they knew something was missing, incomplete. And they were prepared to lay it all on the line, even to death, to find the answer.

Heading into another Christmas - which is all about this Christ-child these men sought - like them, we will only find Him as the answer if we are aware of our lack, if we are aware of our need and prepared to do something about it.

In the middle of a season our world tells us is all about giving (consuming) and family (my comfort and safety) - which all really is just “ad-speak” for “spend obscene amounts of money” - is there space for us to lay it all down, step aside and allow our real needs to speak out? Can we make time to stop and listen to the cry of our hearts, that deep place where we really know that something is missing that only Jesus fills?

Are we prepared to make the sacrifice to take the dangerous journey acknowledging the true wasteland of living without Jesus as King, face the threat of death and destruction (of our society’s ideals/idols) associated with making the shift in our beliefs to what is truly important?

Because we all know:

If nothing changes, nothing changes.

Can you be content with that?

“All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one.” (Hebrews 11:13-16)

Get ready for disruption!

Yesterday I went to meet some friends in the central part of the city. I thought I would catch the train as I enjoy being out among people as well as being able to sit and think my own thoughts or read a book on the hour long journey. On the way to the station, it started to rain. Getting there early, I sat in the car for a few minutes waiting for the rain to abate and eventually made the trek through the pouring rain to the platform, only to find the train was cancelled. Being a Saturday, the next one was going to get me in way too late, so I decided I was better off driving.

On my way, I reflected on my disappointment with not being on the train and the extra pressure of driving on the freeway in heavy rain, not to mention the traffic jams, gridlock and detours at the other end. Asking God about what was going on, the first word that popped into my head was "disruption". Yep, that was true. My day wasn't wrecked and even my overall plans hadn't changed. They had just been disrupted. What disrupted them was that rain!

If you have been following my previous posts, you would know that we have been longing for rain. It has been about 10 weeks since we have had any significant rain, so I could not possibly be upset or annoyed about the rain. However, it did disrupt me. Besides the train being cancelled, I was wearing sandals and my feet got wet! (Everyone say "ohhh")

However, as is His way, this wasn’t the only time this week God has flagged disruption with me. On Thursday we had our 'lives' disrupted when our new neighbour was taking down a tree and managed to drop our telephone line in the process - no internet!! Quelle horreur! Amazingly, Telstra came out and fixed it within a couple of hours and I got a lovely bottle of red from the neighbour for our trouble. But, oh, the potential for disruption!

The third disruption happened today, with a farewell to our much loved senior pastor and his wife as they (and we) move into a new season. This one has the even more potential for real disruption. Replacing a pastor is not usually a quick and easy process and there is the problem of keeping up momentum in the meantime. And what if we don't like the new person? What if they want to change stuff we like? What if they make us uncomfortable?

Coming back to the rain, what strikes me is that sometimes the things we really want to see happen, that we know are from God impact us in unforeseen ways and disrupt our lives. However, I do believe that when God disrupts us, there is always blessing and provision in the midst of it, (way better than phone data and red wine!)

It reminds me of when my daughter was born. I was ready to be a mum. I wanted to be a mum. I was so happy when she was born (she was getting way too big and uncomfortable inside!) and I finally got to meet her. It was so amazing to go through that experience of a new being growing inside you and of becoming a family. 

However, boy did it disrupt my life!

I remember having a conversation with myself one morning at 3am as I was awake feeding her, having my very own little pity party about disrupted sleep. "You wanted this - and this is what it means to have a child. No, your life will never be the same, but it is a good thing."

So, yesterday, when my day was disrupted by the rain in the middle of it all, I felt God was saying, 

Get ready for disruption!

Many of us are longing for change. We are longing for God to step in and bring about those shifts, whether in our personal lives or in our communities and beyond. As we look around the world, we are longing for the transformation that only God can bring: New Life!

And what I feel God is saying to us is: 

"You want change? You want transformation? You want Me to birth something new? Well, get ready for disruption. I am going to do something, and it is going to be big, but I warn you, it is going to disrupt you. Are you ready for that? Anything other than Me that you have held on to as central, as so important, vital even, in your life, are you prepared to have disruption there? Because when I come, I disrupt the status quo, I disrupt the comfortable, I disrupt the satisfied, I disrupt the self-important and self-focussed. There is something bigger at hand, and I am not going to let anything come before it. I'm not going to let anything disrupt my disruption!"

If you don't believe me, just look at what happened when Jesus came the first time - even as a tiny baby, He caused huge disruption. By the time He was a fully grown man. He caused so much disruption to people that they wanted to kill Him, which is exactly what they did, and He even disrupted that, by rising from the dead!

So how will you respond to God's disruptions to your plans, your comfort? Will you complain? Will you throw yourself a little pity party? Will you run and hide? Or will you ask Him to show you the way forward, and embrace the new path, be ready to pour yourself out for whatever God is doing to bring about that change?

Get ready! Disruption is coming!!

What's Your Next Season?

There are only two certainties in life: Death and Taxes.

So goes the quote attributed to Benjamin Franklin. Not wanting to upstage him at all, though, I would like to add a third certainty: Change. Change is just as inevitable. The way we respond to change, however, is as unique as each of us.

My husband and I are going through one of those changes in life right now. As we move toward becoming "empty-nesters", the next generation of our family is arriving. Our niece had her first baby last October (so now I have graduated from being an ordinary, run-of-the-mill aunt to being a great-aunt!), and we became grandparents in January, with a second grandchild on the way in August. It is a new season in our lives, and one we are happy to see.

But what happens when we approach changes we are not so sure about? What happens when we are comfortable where we are, and we don't want things to change? How do we deal with changes we just don't want?

Sitting out on our deck recently, I noticed that a few leaves on the trees were starting to exchange their vibrant summer green for their autumn glory. It got me thinking: how do the leaves know it is getting time to change? The weather didn't seem any cooler or wetter. And what makes some leaves change earlier and others wait?

As I reflected on this, I realised that it was a good picture of how we humans can respond to the changing seasons of life.

Some people are ahead of the game. They can see change is coming, and they get ready straight away, embracing it with gusto. While others are still settling in after the previous shift, they are already looking ahead, already preparing for and getting excited about what is coming.

For others, they wait a little longer, wait until they are sure the change is coming. Like the leaves realising the temperature is dropping, the days are significantly shorter, we can wait until the previous season is definitely over before we are ready for the next. Sometimes we see the trend, also. We see the increasing numbers of others ready for change, and we join them, moving with them, not wanting to be left behind.

Then there are those who just want things to stay the way they are. We can be like those leaves that just hang on and hang on, all through winter, stubbornly refusing to let go of the tree even though they are well and truly past their prime, brown and dried up, but refusing to drop. We can be just as stubborn, holding on to the past when that season has well and truly finished and we should be well in to the next.

Jesus talked a bit about recognising seasons in some of His final messages, (see Luke 21, for example). In the middle of describing some of the signs of the times, He reminds us not to be afraid, (v.9), but to be alert, ready for what is next (v.34-6). The bridal party in Matthew 25 is another great example of our need to be prepared for what is imminent, to be looking ahead.

Dealing with change has been a real struggle for me at times. Either living in denial of my need to change, or having unrealistic beliefs about my ability to change things back to how they were kept me stuck at a number of points in my life, even contributing to depression at one point.

Over the journey of transformation that God has led me on, I have realised that burying my head or running away is counter productive. I have learnt that it is much less painful and far quicker to embrace change, to push past the struggle; to meet the difficulty head on in those times where change is not my choice. I have learnt that although change can be uncomfortable, if I allow myself to move and even be changed with it, the benefits generally far outweigh any discomfort.

Although we can get very comfortable in the season we are in, and wish we could stay there forever, just like the leaf on the branch, refusing to fall, we end up out of place and alone. The weather has changed around us, and we find it is no longer as comfortable as it once was. One way or another, we will get shifted on by what it coming next. It is up to us whether we jump or get pushed. 

What changes are on the horizon for you? Are you  ready to allow your true colours to come through as you launch off your branch into the next season?

For God So Judged the World

What is it about judgement and condemnation that makes them useful tools to bring about positive change? 

Or if they are not, why do so many feel the need to pour them out on the heads of others?

Personally, I have struggled for a number of years as I have read the judgements meted out by many a Christian online about other people; be they other Christians, those of other faiths, or even atheists. I fail to understand how these sorts of evaluations and attitudes marry with the rest of Jesus’ teachings. Even though He mostly ministered to those of His own faith group, He rarely stood in judgement, and then, really only over those who were busy expounding on how much better they were than everyone else.

As I read through the Gospels, the recurring theme I see is one of love, compassion and mercy. I know that I am far from alone when I suggest that if, as Christians, we acted with love, compassion and mercy, if we offered up grace, as it was given to us,we would be a whole lot more attractive to most people on this planet.

So why don’t we?

From my own experience, as I have wondered at times about my desire to speak judgement over others, whether in my heart or to another, I realise that it is mostly about my own sense of inferiority or lack. Usually, it has been about a desire to knock someone down a peg or two because I have felt they have done that to me and/or others. There has been a sense of trying to vindicate or even avenge myself.

Over time, I have gotten better at recognising and dealing with my own insecurities through more productive means than criticism and judgement – let’s face it, we usually don’t really feel better when we drag someone else down with us, anyway! There are a couple of things that stand out.

The first is that no one can make you feel “less than” unless you give them permission.

Why do we give them permission? Usually, it is simply the assessment we have already made of ourselves rising up in agreement with what we are perceiving, even though it might be subconscious. Closely related to this is the issue of fear. We are afraid we don't match up. We are afraid of being found out as a fraud. We are afraid we really are not good enough. We are afraid we are not loveable.

And while there may be a number of ways in which we can get our needs for feeling worthwhile, valued and loveable met, I firmly believe that if other people are our primary source of this, we will always be in danger of reverting back to that place of “less than” and judgement. There will always be times where they “fail” to give as we think we “need”, or our own brokenness means we fail to receive.

In my own journey, I have found the best, most secure and consistent place to find my worth and value has been out of my relationship with God. It is a place I can go back to at any time and get a refill, knowing that He is constant and consistent in His kindness and love for starters. And on those occasions I still feel that prickle of insecurity, a great question to ask Him is to remind me how He feels about me, how He sees me. This leads to the second point. 

We can’t give what we haven’t received. 

And maybe this is why many of us as Christians feel the need to give out judgement. Because this is what we have believed we deserve and receive from God. If we have a sense at any level that all God has for us is judgement, then we will inevitably pass that on to others.

Perhaps another “favourite” verse has been, “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God”. We focus way more on our sinfulness than God’s grace and mercy, and so we fail to receive His grace, His mercy and even His love. Yes, we can give intellectual assent to His love for us, and even quote a multitude of verses about it, but do we know how to receive it, and do we continue to receive it regularly?

And while I would also agree that we need to come to a place of recognising that we often don’t meet the mark, we must be very careful that this is not about condemnation, but about realising that we can’t do it on our own; that  God is so “for us”, and wants to make up the difference, wants to pour Himself into us, so that we can do “all things” – especially to extend that love, compassion, mercy and grace to a world that is in desperate need of as much as it can get.

"For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of."  Luke 6:45